Many teachers and parents mean something completely different when we say "have a better relationship" with students. We DON'T mean being a friend. We mean that we do the hard work of conscious discipline. You cannot make someone else do something! Once a child is too big to be physically carried out of a situation, we have to have mutual respect. As the teacher, I am in charge of the classroom. But the older the students get, the fewer the rules need to be. I am wondering these things: why did the phone need to be put away? Who was being harmed by it? Since I can't force this kid to learn, wouldn't it be better to provide an engaging environment where she would rather listen and get involved than be on her phone? If I felt it was hurting others with the distraction, I would talk with her and explain that. Then, I would give her the choice to put away the phone and engage, or go out in the hall to scroll on her phone. She may choose to stay outside the whole time! Then I need to have further conversations (or a school counselor could do this), to try to find out why she is making these choices. It is often a learning disability or undiagnosed neurodiversity that causes kids to never engage. Maybe she has experienced trauma and just wants to "check out." In any case, I would not walk over to another adult and tell them they have to put their phone away. Teens need to be part of the solutions in their own education. Otherwise, they become adults who have never made choices for themselves or spoken up for their own needs. We are doing them a disservice by treating them as children until the moment they graduate.
By the way, I haven't seen the video you describe, and I don't see a link, so I'm just going by what you wrote. I haven't seen the teacher or student's actual actions.
One more thing - if students are treated with this kind of respect and support, they will stop lashing out at teachers. This has been tested and tried in entire school districts. Here's a video of Ross Greene explaining why we don't use "consequences": https://youtu.be/Day3yy5Eyaw
